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That’s Hollywood For You

I know a Brando friend who describes Marlon as “the most difficult nice guy in the world.” . . . Louis Prima played the violin before he started swinging with the trumpet. . . . Keely Smith started as President of the Prima Fan Club in Norfolk, Va., before Louis invited her to sing with him. . . . Kim Novak likes luxury in the bedroom. . . . I’ll bet if Betty Grable hadn’t been a movie star someone would be discovering her for pictures today. . . . I know a real Private Eye. His name is Norman Placey and his address is 77277 Sunset Strip. . . . Efrem Zimbalist Jr. is the matinee idol of night-time TV. . . . Out of the mouth of Tina Louise: “I’d rather be seduced mentally than physically.” . . .

Jill St. John wears crazy sport shirts and on her they’re form-fitting. Jill has a figure whose message is easy to decode. . . . I’ve been informed, Clyde. that square was first used by jazz musicians to describe anyone who didn’t understand their type of music and all that jazz. But if a bopster tries to apply the word to Jimmie Rodgers’ lovely country ballads, he’ll have to fight Jimmie’s wife Colleen first. . . . Hollywood Weather Report: Tomorrow no fog so you can see the smog. . . . Shirley MacLaine looks as if she cuts her own hair. . . . On TV all gangsters have blond girlfriends who look tough and cry easy. . . . My friend Mike Curtiz called a popular performer “a bathtub actor with a swimming pool complex.”

Perry Mason is so busy that Raymond Burr often sleeps in his studio dressing room, not having time to go home to Malibu. . . . I’d say Yul Brynner is now imitating himself. . . . Get a load of June Christy singing “Lament.” It’s Edna St. Vincent Millay’s poem “The Penitent” put to music. . . . Tab Hunter likes mood music. . . . Out of the mouth of Maureen Stapleton: “I cant stand to have life go on. That’s why I like to stay up and watch the Late Movies on TV. With them, it’s always 1935!” . . . Brigitte Bardot claims she never wears a flower on an evening gown because it would wilt!

I was there when Sir Laurence Olivier was thrown by his white horse. Calmly Sir Laurence picked himself up, saying, “It must be a Method horse.” . . . Liz Taylor uses her eyelashes as provocatively as a fan dancer uses a fan. But when I kissed her at her wedding, I was too excited myself to notice if she kisses with her eyes open or closed. . . . On TV Westerns the heroes have gals who are understanding and wait for them until they run the bad man out of town. . . . I’ve never seen a tree as lovely as a good poem. . . . Zsa Zsa Gabor has a wonderful women’s instinct. Zee Zee can discover anything except the obvious. . . .

If you haven’t seen “Room at the Top,” hurry to do so as soon as you finish reading this column. . . . Out of the mouth of Robert Mitchum: “The worst thing for an actor is to get rich. It’s ruined far more actors than drink.” . . . Cara Williams is always in orbit. . . . If you want to see David (Richard Diamond) Janssen, you can find him in the third row at La Scala trying to guess movie stars’ names from initials tossed at him by music man Pete Rugulo. . . . The non-conformists now constitute the largest group of conformists in the country. If you doubt it, ask Mort Sahl. . . . And That’s Hollywood For You



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